Hello! My name is Angel Edwards and I am a new writer for 10:31 Life Ministries. This is my first article. My desire in writing this to you is for you to know God; to truly know Him. A lot of this article is about my story of where I have been and where the Lord has brought me from. I look forward to writing more articles for you all. Thank you for reading. God Bless!
Devoured, Withered, Choked, and… Alive?
Teens were everywhere I looked moving from one place to another. Every moment of time was filled with the hustle and bustle of the early afternoon. The sound of voices echoed off the walls throughout the narrow halls. As I made my way through the chaos I saw numerous groups gathered around the crème painted lockers. There were those who were busy orchestrating plans for the weekend while I witnessed the sharing of secrets between others. Usually separated from their group was the couple walking hand in hand treasuring each moment before time elapsed. Occasionally, I caught the eye of one of my peers; one whose name was often unknown. Individuals soon became blurred as each one briskly walked past me on the way to their destinations. Each break in the day was just like the one prior; a time to meet up with friends while reluctantly making my way to class. The bell would often ring threatening me to get a move on, the word TARDY branded on my forehead.
My high school experience wasn't much different from anyone else. It was a time for friends, memories, self-expression and discovery. Despite all these "normal" experiences there was an unseen battle raging from within me. What were once mere shadows of sin quickly became an expansion of darkness. The worst part, however, wasn't the darkness. No.... it was thinking that there was nothing outside of it.
So often I appeared to be happy; a smile simply printed on my face masking the unrevealed truth. I had given up trying to change myself. I vowed to follow my heart and emotions. I desired to be free of the lies… the worries…. the fears… often questioning why the “real me” could not be accepted. As I scanned face after face of other teenagers like myself I felt alone. I didn’t believe that others could contain deep secrets similar to my own, but perhaps they too were afraid to disclose their true identities. I didn’t realize at the time that following my heart was one of the best ways to remain lost.
…..
If we look at the Parable of the Sower we see Jesus discussing to a large crowd the conditions of the human heart:
And when a great crowd was gathering and people from town after town came to him, he said in a parable, “A sower went out to sow his seed. And as he sowed, some fell along the path and was trampled underfoot, and the birds of the air devoured it. And some fell on the rock, and as it grew up, it withered away, because it had no moisture. And some fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up with it and choked it. And some fell into good soil and grew and yielded a hundredfold.” As he said these things, he called out, “He who has ears to hear, let him hear.” (Luke 8:4-8 ESV)
He goes on a few verses later to discuss the meaning behind this parable. The former self that I shared above was prior to Christ in my life. As stated in this parable, I was one who had heard the word of God yet this seed fell along the path and was trampled where the birds devoured it. I was oblivious to the enemies work in my life. The word warns us of the enemy’s attacks but if we are not prepared or are unaware of such things then how can we fight? The word was taught to me on many occasions but I felt it wasn’t for me. The soil of my heart was hard and impenetrable.
As I continually heard about the word my heart soon became heavy. I became more aware of my actions believing I didn’t belong on the same path as God’s beloved ones. One week I claimed to have found the Lord and the next I was back to listening to satanic music filled with rage towards God. I ran to the Lord as much as I ran away from Him- spiritual forces fighting for my life.
One day, at school, a sower went out to sow His seed. This sower in particular was a young woman. She had the creativity of an artist and the long legs of a cross-country runner. We both worked on the senior ads for the high school yearbook and attended the same church. I met her when my heart was constantly withering the word. This specific day I had just about enough. My life seemed to have shattered into fragments right before my eyes for the life I had lived in secret was no longer covered by a mask. It appeared open for all to peek in and see.
Throughout the year this girl had invited me to various events which I usually declined. She continued to witness by showing me the love of Christ. She did this by simply becoming a friend despite our extreme differences in morals and interests. This specific day she invited me to go to a Christian winter camp in Colorado with the youth group. She had mentioned it once before but now seemed like a good time to get away. I gave in and told her I’d look into it. That weekend I discovered that someone had graciously donated money so I could go. Not only that but I filled the LAST available spot.
That weekend I met the Lord for the first time. Since then nothing has remained the same. After becoming a Christian I saw my heart for what it was. As time went by my heart began to change and take up this precious word that’s been given to us. Within the recent past I have found my heart to be within the thorns. These thorns are an illusion of the world around us. We can be so easily ensnared by the ways of this world and not realize it until it is too late. So often we may justify our actions based on the world’s standards instead of Gods.
The last condition of the heart that Jesus talks about is the good soil; the soil that “grew and yielded a hundredfold”. This is where we should strive to be. This is someone who receives the word with an open heart. One who consumes it and makes it a part of their lifestyle. I know this was the case for the girl at my high school. I was able to witness Gods desire to love me from her. She didn’t care that I seemed too lost to try and find. She didn’t care how many times I declined her invites. She did care, however, about me knowing God. I look at this story, my story, and see the perseverance that is needed sometimes to open the eyes of the blind. Jesus states to His disciples that good soil needed for the seed will bear fruit with patience. Patience produces a maturing faith. Eventually we reflect God Himself who is the ultimate sower. We start to portray His ways by seeing what He sees. The seed is a very important part of the parable- just as important as the sower Himself. While the sower is only mentioned once within the passage we see that nothing can take place without Him. The idea that the seeds are placed within various soils shows that all hearts can change. This should give us tremendous hope. While we aim to become the sower and have a heart of good soil there are times in our lives where our hearts may be hindered. Life is a journey through various trying times so there may be instances in your life where your heart can change for better or for worse. This is why It is so important to check our hearts so often.
No matter where you are at right now, this every moment, know that there is hope. I encourage you to be aware of those around you- to seek the heart God has for others. Know that you have the ability to alter someone’s life! Seek to know the Lord more. As stated within this parable, Luke 8:6, moisture is vital for a seed to grow. Jesus says He will fill you: “…whoever drinks of the water that I give him will never be thirsty again” (John 4:14). In order to receive this water we MUST spend time with Him. It is not simply a matter of knowing about Him but it’s all about knowing Him. The word is essential to understanding the way He feels about us. This then impacts how we feel about Him. The seed will take root when, and only when, the soil is well watered. In order to water others we must first be filled ourselves.
You are A Chosen Generation: Set-Apart for His Glory.
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